What to do when it is 12:45 am & you can't sleep- write a blog post!
I've got religion on the brain. Such a complicated, confusing thing. A little history about me. I wasn't raised in a very religious household. Despite the fact that I had a grandfather who was a Lutheran Pastor, my parents and I never belonged to a church nor was I ever baptized. Flash to present day: I am yearning for something. It comes and goes depending on circumstances in my life. Sometimes I feel like its all good, I'm a good person, I have my own personal relationship with God- enough said. Other times (like now) I feel almost desperate to belong to a church, to be baptized. Especially now that I have a daughter I feel like it is important. Ever since I became pregnant I have prayed daily for her health and safety. Now I feel like I need to have her & myself baptized. But first we need to join a church and I don't even know where to start with that. Adding more to this confusion is my husband's current view of organized religion. He was raised Catholic but has grown to question things. He describes himself not as skeptical but as looking for holes in what is supposed to be the truth. He is curious about all religions of the world & despite his slight aversion to church, thinks about religion often. The problem is that we are not exactly on the same page with where we are regarding religion. I am moving towards Christianity and he is moving away from it. So, how do I pick a church? Do I go alone & then bring my daughter when she's old enough? Do we compromise as a family?
This is what I'd like to believe:
-There is a God watching over us
-Heaven exists (although i think reincarnation is pretty neat too)
-God loves all of us
- That God hears our prayers (although, I don't really know if he can doing anything about them- I see him as being watchful, but removed)
This is what I'm not sure about:
-Why bad things happen
I don't like these things:
-The idea that God punishs/is wrathful
- Satan (don't think I believe in it)
-overly preachy, in your face religion/people
-scare tactics/guilt in church
-that there is only one way (i.e., my religion is right, yours is wrong)
I want to go somewhere that I feel loved. I want my daughter & I to be baptized so that we can join our loved ones in Heaven someday. I want an open-minded church that is more on the liberal side. I looked into Universalist Unitarianism and like it but I'm not sure about it because it isn't Christian. I like it because it is accepting of all religions and its members claim all sorts of religions. Perhaps a good compromise for my family right now? Part of me feels loyal to the Lutheran Church because that is what I know best. Who knows...
Anyone have wise thoughts for me?
PS- Please don't beat me down for any of my thoughts- I'm just trying to find my way.
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8 comments:
The Methodists and the Congregational church are pretty lad back. I'm Catholic, but a convert. I think that no matter what people may say, religion is what yo make of it in your everyday life. It is something I think about more now that I have Luke.
I think that if you are in search, yuo should find something you are looking for. i was raised methodist, you can try that.
It appears you and I are of a mind about religion... So, here is my 2c. Find a church you like, one that is Christian since it sounds like that is your comfort zone.
Then keep your ideas about heaven, hell, right and wrong religions, etc right where they are. You do not have to have sanction of your ideas from a church to be happy there. However, you will need to try to find a church that has non-confrontational people for the most part, which might be the real challenge.
I have found recently that curch people are more open to varying opinions. I'm not saying everyone is open to "alternative" ideas, but then you don't have to share with those people, do you?
I find I am perfectly happy with a religion that is quite strict and quite opinionated. They think I am weird because I don't believe everything they teach. We debate. It is OK with me and OK with them. Works well, I think.
I've only met 2 people that preferred I not "question the Holy Scripture". I told them that is how I learn and that Jesus would want me to learn all I can. That kinda stopped them cold - which was fun. :)
Have a good time with your search. Do not get discouraged and you will eventually find a supportive and loving church home for your family.
Good luck.
Just a quick comment...
Be careful not to create a God for yourself that doesn't really exist. For instance - if the God of the bible is true, then we need to trust what is says about him, and what he says to us through it. It's not about being legalistic or beating down on other people's beliefs - just make sure that you are basing your beliefs on some kind of evidence - not just on what you would like to believe - because if you want to believe that there are many ways to God, and that Christianity shouldn't be biggotted enough to believe it is the only way to heaven, then you have to make up your own religion which the bible would directly contradict. Just remember that we were made in God's image, he was not made in ours.
I pray you find your way - and that you don't see this as a condemning or "preachey" comment. I hope it helped
For exposure I would suggest an episcopal church. It was there at a funeral mass that I was able to take communion next to a Catholic, and a Presbyterian.
I however am much like you--have questions but no answers. Before my miscarriage I was going to my sisters Methodist church and felt VERY comfortable there. They have open communion and aren't pushy for joining.
Good luck on your quest!
I found your blog from a friends,I love it and I hope it's ok if I follow you! I just want you to know I am praying for you!
Love, Hugs and Prayers-
Tiffay
thepiferfamily.blogspot.com
Hey - just checking in to see how you are. Hope everything is going well!
Kate (I have a new blog)
I myself am a Muslim. I am very liberal when it comes to politics and freedom of expression but very conservative when it comes to my personal life. I find myself having similar thoughts as you. I just wish the world was more accepting of each other. I personally believe even if you're not a Muslim, as long as you're a good-hearted person, you'll make it to heaven. I think a lot of the youth is thinking like that nowadays. It wouldn't be such a bad thing if the world was like that, except some people could have a twisted perception of being good-hearted, and there could be mass deception so that everyone has that twisted perception. I think that is what religions are for though, to make the rules more clear cut. Its a shame that some religious people put down other religions just to try to sell their religion. It really only makes their religion look worse if you ask me. I remember going to the Arab festival last Summer and seeing a small group of Christians protesting I guess you could call it. They were confined to a small street corner and were holding up picket signs saying stuff like "Jesus is the way". I just shook my head in disgust. And if they didn't know, it wasn't a Muslim festival, it was an Arab festival. Believe it or not there are Christian Arabs. Its like, why can't we live without someone trying to make us conform? You have your views I have mine. I don't push mine on you so don't push yours on me. Extremists suck.
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